The Thing About Made To Penetrate

As a male survivor of a likely serial female rapist, I am sometimes asked about “made to penetrate”, which is used to describe how women rape men. Yeah, I know the UK doesn’t call it rape. I don’t care. I’m not required to abide by their regressive definitions or adopt a submissive posture in the face of predatory radfem rape apologia. Peddle that elsewhere. I promise to hurt your feelings if you come at me with it.

I get asked frequently about the mechanics of “made to penetrate” or female-on-male rape, sometimes because people are curious and or looking for a way to deny women can commit SV. So, let’s talk.

So, how does “made to penetrate” work? I can tell ya’ll my story. In 1990, I went to a club and met a woman via a mutual friend. He drove her to the club and then left, leaving her stranded. She asked if I could give her a ride home later, but wanted to wait until the club closed. I was fine with that because it was a Friday night. I was 19 and she was mid-20s. She bought me some drinks and spaced them out through the night. I was 19, so I didn’t put the pieces together. Why buy me alcohol if she wanted me to drive? Because she didn’t. That was never the plan.

At the end of the night, I drank a bunch of water in a vain attempt to sober up but clearly couldn’t drive. So, we paid for a motel room (right next door to the club) with double beds. Before laying down on my bed, she brought me a cup of water and insisted I drink it. I suspect it was drugged with something. It could have been literally anything that makes you drowsy.

I woke up in the middle of the night to her on top of me, erect and inside her. She coaxed me back to sleep. Hours later, I woke up to her again, this time the sun was out. She was on top again and after the disorientation wore off, she noticed me awake when I moved. I was ordered “don’t be forceful” and she screamed at me about it when I moved at all. Apparently, I was making it harder for her to rape me. Yeah. I was expected to just lay there and wait it out. I dissociated until she aided herself to climax.

So, the mechanics of how was I “made to penetrate”? Simple, she pulled off my underwear, forced an erection with either her mouth, hands or both and then climbed on top of me and slid herself over it. Then, she threatened me when the drugs and alcohol finally wore off during the second rape. It really isn’t that complicated.

I was tied up with her for approximately 18 hours from meeting her at the club before she allowed me to leave. There was a whole lot more in the middle. The above hit the high points of “how”.

The frequent “I don’t understand” excuses from Tumblr Meme Ph.D. activists and radfem extremists is disingenuous at this point. This is Biology 101 level information and there are actual academic studies and books available for those who really want to know more. Maybe, just maybe, listen more and scoff less. I swear, after 18 years of this conversation, ya’ll are still exhausting with this mess.