Yesterday afternoon I saw the film "The Curious Case of Benjamin Button" inspired by the short story of the same name authored by F. Scott Fitzgerald (http://www.online-literature.com/fitzgerald/jazz-age/6/ ). This caused me a bit of an epiphany as I sat in the theatre.
The moment that really clicked in my brain was when Button (as read by his daughter in his diary) said that sometimes the people who have the most significant impacts on our lives are those we don't remember well – as he unsuccessfully attempted to remember the name of an elderly friend and mentor. I can think of several of these people who significantly impacted my life in positive and negative ways.
One such person did impact my life due to a chance encounter that I could have never predicted. I don't remember her name. I can't see her face. I vaguely recall her stature and hair. Yet, she changed me in ways I still do not fully understand.
She made me doubt my trusting nature. She gave me insecurities and fears that I am still fighting to overcome. She has also taught me that I am much stronger than I could have ever imagined. Her callous act contributed greatly to the man I am today. I am not saying it was worth it – not at all. I would rather have learned more about myself in a different manner.
She was not memorable. However, her choices that night have left a lasting impact. She manipulated me. She drugged me. She raped me. She hurt me. She has forever changed me. However, she does not own me.
And I can barely remember her…
Also posted here:
http://remodel4life.blogspot.com/2008/12/significant-impact-of-whats-her-name.html
I know that feeling. I have seen my abuser more times than you’ve seen her, yet I can never draw up her face in my memory at will yet I’d recognize her anywhere. It’s a rather strange feeling.
6/08/2009 2:46 PM